Friday, February 18, 2011

Can You Relate To This? :(

It's the loneliest feeling in the world to find yourself standing up when everyone else is sitting down. To have everybody look at you and say "what's the matter with you?" I know what it feels like. Walking down an empty street, listening to the sound of your own footsteps. Shutters closed, blinds drawn, doors locked against you. And you aren't sure whether you're walking toward something, or if you're just walking away. Do you ever get that feeling where you don't want to talk to anybody? You don't want to smile and you don't want to fake being happy. But at the same time you don't know exactly what's wrong either. There isn't a way to explain it to someone who doesn't already understand. If you could want anything in the world it would be to be alone. People have stopped being comforting and being along never was. At least when you're alone no one will constantly ask you what is wrong and there isn't anyone who won't take 'I don't know' for an answer. You feel the way you do just because. You hope the feeling will pass soon and that you will be able to be yourself again, but until then all you can do is wait.


1 comment:

lahana said...

Wow. You captured something so deep. Thank you for opening up your soul for this poem/post. I canrelate to feeling like it was simply too much energy to talk with others..that the only thing bearable was just to be by myself---but even that felt unbearable at times. Thankfully, these feeling pass because life doesn't stand still. Soon you'll be in high school and college where you'll find people who will understand you and things will begin to feel light and free again...